In the almost 6 weeks that I have been in Cambodia I have learned a lot. Lessons about not only culture, but also the meaning and importance of family, listening to your intuition, the strength of love and friendship, true compassion and humility. As I reflect on my time here I am grateful for this experience. Although I will not be staying as long as planned, I feel I have grown leaps and bounds, made new friends and memories that will last forever.
I started making a list of things I have learned in an effort to not forget. Some are cultural tips, other about life in general and could be applied to many situations and different parts of the world, and maybe some that are uniquely Cambodian. So here it is.... lessons learned!
1) Just when you think you cannot sweat anymore than is humanly possible, you sweat more! Sweating to the point of soaking wet is something I got used to in my time here.
2) "same same, but different." I swear this should be Cambodia's national motto. Many words are the same, but have different meanings.
3) Everyone thinks I from Europe. Not many Americans travel here as it is so far from the States.
4) Everyone thinks I have blonde hair which my hair stylist back home would be impressed with as he has told me the same thing. I am the darkest shade of blonde there is. I'm sure Matt would agree sometimes ;)
5) My family is the most amazing group of people in the world (at least my world). They have been so supportive, loving, and compassionate throughout this trip and really there for me during some extremely rough times. I am truly blessed and so very appreciative!
6) No matter how much you think you have prepared, you are never fully "prepared." This is true no matter where you are I guess. I guess the one thing you can prepare for is to have to wing it!
7) Sometimes things are shown to you in ways you never expected nor imagined. Not all will be what you want, but all will be what you need whether it is "good," "bad," or indifferent.
8) White skin is highly regarded here in Cambodia. There are skin whitening creams and treatments everywhere! White skin is a symbol of higher class in that you don't have to work outdoors (in the fields) therefore you have lighter skin. The darker your skin, the more you have to work outdoors in the sweltering sun and thus the very dark skin. So funny that Americans put great emphasis on being tan as it symbolizes youth, beauty, and wealth.
9) Cold showers feel amazing after a day in the 90*+ weather with 100% humidity.
10) All market vendors have "special price, special discount" for me.... and every other tourist!
11) Infants, toddlers, and dogs can balance amazingly well on the front of a moto bike.
12) Cambodians can seriously pack a van (and moto and tuk tuk and every other mode of transportation)! Never seen anything like it in my life!
13) People (well mostly men) urinate anywhere and everywhere right out in front of everyone; on sides of buildings, side of the road, whenever, wherever. Hey you gotta go, you gotta go!
14) I am thankful for being born in the great USA, especially as a woman!
15) I often take my rights and privileges for granted without thinking twice. This trip has really opened my eyes and made me realize I am very fortunate.
16) This experience has been the most enlightening and humbling time of my life.
17) Family is #1!
18) Many religions have things in common. Belief beyond oneself that you should do good, be good to others,and good things will return to you whether it be in this life or another. Honor your ancestors. Show appreciation and gratitude. Respect and honor your elders; care for them as they age; appreciate and learn from their life experiences.
19) Listen to the tuk tuk and moto drivers yelling at you that there is a hellacious rain storm coming. I just thought they were trying to get me to pay them for a ride. They were actually pointing at the sky and telling me to get cover, not wanting to take me anywhere. Caught in a trenchall downpour 5 minutes later- lesson learned!
20) People wear surgical masks here b/c it is so dirty, lots of exhaust and bad smells. Every time I see a surgical mask I think of H1N1!
21) Cambodian rain storms have nothing on Arizona monsoons- way worse!
22) You never truly appreciate Air Con until it goes out in the middle of the night and you can't get it fixed for days!
23) Lady Gaga has been translated in Khmer: Poker Face
24) Some people really do have your back and want the best for you. Others are a complete fraud!
25) I gotten used to eating alone, doing things by myself and I am actually enjoying it. Gives you a certain Confidence!
26) There's nothing like receiving a care package, letter, or card from home! Best feeling! Even emails from home are really exciting to see in your "Inbox."
27) Khmer music videos... where do I start. Karaoke gone very bad!
28) Your ears perk up when you hear someone speaking English without a British accent. There's hope they might too be an American
29) Khmer people as a whole are very friendly, helpful, and gracious.
30) TV shows without commercials are awesome!
31) I didn't know Top Model was in so many countries: America, Britain, Canada. Now why is there no Top Male Model???
32) Honking is very annoying.
33) Saltines and soft pillows are the best!
34) In the words of my tuk tuk driver, I will "never forget Cambodia"
35) I have never prayed so much in my life. It's amazing where you will "find" God. For me it was on the bathroom floor during a horrible bout of food poisoning and many times thereafter.
36) When you really love people and they love you, you can feel their presence with you every moment-especially during the really challenging times, where you are weak and so scared. Those people are with you every second, surrounding you with their love and prayers.
37) Avocado green salad Cambodian style=emergency room and hospital stay. Not good.
38) Everything truly does happen for a reason.
39) Trust your intuition. God gave it to you for a very important reason! Don't try to reason with yourself. Just listen!
40) Life is Beautiful! Life is useful!
Saturday, October 16, 2010
Thursday, October 14, 2010
Siem Reap/Angkor! Amazing!
October 4-10th
This week continued the Cambodian National Holiday P' Chum Ben which means Festival of the Dead. It is lasts for 15 days and consists of Cambodians making pilgrimages to wats (temples) to honor their ancestors by giving offerings of money, food, flowers, incense, candles. These offerings are passed through monks. Devout Buddhists are expected to visit seven wats during the holiday. So with the holiday we did not have any work so I decided to travel to Siem Reap and Angkor to see what Cambodians call the "8th wonder of the world" Angkor Wat.
I left Phnom Penh on Thursday October 7th and took a seven hour bus ride to Siem Reap. It was great to get out f the city and see more the beautufil Cambodian countryside and the lush green rice fields and tall sugar cane trees. The bus was only $11! Mekong Express Limousine! Great service. It had air con, you were served water, a snack, and a narrated tour! Great Deal! They even had Khmer karaoke on a TV all the way. That I could have done without, but it is pretty entertaining to watch!
Siem Reap was quite pleasant! Much calmer than Phnom Penh! It felt really good to get away from the large city and see a different city! I arrived at my hotel and immediately felt relaxed! I grabbed a bite to eat and then headed out to the Night Market-the only of it's kind in Cambodian. It was really cool! Very calm and not jammed packed like the Russian Market of Phnom Penh. Vendors let you browse without hassling you, a band played Khmer music as you enter and it is just a really nice environment. I got some fun t shirts, browsed around and then headed back to my hotel. I was spent after the day of traveling and finally being able to let down a bit. There is thing here in Asia where you can get a "pedicure" of sorts by placing your feet in a tank of fish that eat off your cuticles. It is called Dr. Fish. Well there are those Dr. Fish cuticle eating places everywhere outside of night market! I saw at least 5 places that have fish tanks with people just chilling getting their cuticles eaten care off. I cut my toe up last week on our apartment gate so I figured it wouldn't be good to stick my feet in that water, but I am really curious about it! If my toe wasn't messed up I think I would consider trying it. I headed back to my hotel, souvenirs in hand, no "pedicure" and ready for a good night's rest. I had scheduled a tour for Angkor on Friday so I was gonna need the rest.
Friday morning my tour guide met me in the hotel lobby and we headed to Angkor. You have to get your picture taken and they put it on your one day pass which you show to enter the multiple wats (temples) that make up Angkor. I should've smiled- not my best pic, haha! First we toured the infamous Angkor Wat! Angkor Wat means "temple that is a city." Wow! What site! It is considered the largest religious site in the world. Being that is was P'Chum Holiday many locals had made their way with gifts for the monks and their ancestors. Very cool sight to see! Khmer culture in full force! it is the largest religious temple in the world! it was built in 1113 and took 37 years to complete. i can't believe men built this structure! amazing! we spent from 8-12:30pm there, walking around and sitting and talking (well the guide talking, me trying to understand and hear him. khmer speak very softly which can be hard when there are 9 million kids running around screaming. I learned a lot about traditional khmer culture, the roles of men and women. thank god i was born a woman in the USA!!! so thankful! he was telling me abut how it is acceptable for khmer men to have many partners, domestic violence against women very common and arranged marriages are still the norm. historically girls do not receive education. that is slowly starting to change. he said they are about 50-70 years behind the US in terms of gender equality issues. I didn't realize that tourism here in siem reap didn't really take off until the late 1990s and they didn't have a university until 2000. crazy! another result of the war and lack of education b/c of the khmer rouge. about only 30% of the population is educated. again- another thing we in the US take for granted, the opportunity to go to school!
Ok so I know I always say I can't believe how much I sweat but today took it to a whole new level. literally soaked! I drank 2 liters of water! and i swear it all came out as sweat! Something odd happened as I was touring Angkor Wat. This Korean girl took my picture as I was walking past her which was weird. Apparently western people are highly admired in Asia for their white skin, big eyes, and my guide said my blonde hair. It was odd and a little flattering in a way I guess.
I had lunch by myself outside angkor wat and then we went to angkor thom. got some really cool pictures. we went to bayon and ta prohm- where the trees of the jungle have uprooted temples. I saw the infamous tomb raider tree and got a picture. Now i just need to see the movie! My tour guide was really good and took lots of pictures of me and was fun!
The day concluded with a much needed and appreciated shower and dinner at the hotel restaurant. I still can't believe I toured Angkor! So awesome!
Saturday I headed to Artisans D'Angkor. It is a really cool store and site where craftsmen master ancient crafts such as high quality lacquer works, silk paintings, stone and wood carvings. I spent about two hours there! I got a tour of where the crafts are created and then spent about an hour and a half in the store.
I headed back to the hotel for a spa lunch and massage! Oh it felt soo good! Later that evening I headed out to a an Apsara performance. Apsara dancing used to be for Khmer Kings only. Very intricate dancing with beautiful costumes. It was a buffet style dinner and then performance It rained so hard that for good majority of the time you couldn't hear the music! I was a bit bummed but i hope i can catch another performance while I'm in Cambodia. Very beautiful!
Great weekend escape! I didn't want to leave!
This week continued the Cambodian National Holiday P' Chum Ben which means Festival of the Dead. It is lasts for 15 days and consists of Cambodians making pilgrimages to wats (temples) to honor their ancestors by giving offerings of money, food, flowers, incense, candles. These offerings are passed through monks. Devout Buddhists are expected to visit seven wats during the holiday. So with the holiday we did not have any work so I decided to travel to Siem Reap and Angkor to see what Cambodians call the "8th wonder of the world" Angkor Wat.
I left Phnom Penh on Thursday October 7th and took a seven hour bus ride to Siem Reap. It was great to get out f the city and see more the beautufil Cambodian countryside and the lush green rice fields and tall sugar cane trees. The bus was only $11! Mekong Express Limousine! Great service. It had air con, you were served water, a snack, and a narrated tour! Great Deal! They even had Khmer karaoke on a TV all the way. That I could have done without, but it is pretty entertaining to watch!
Siem Reap was quite pleasant! Much calmer than Phnom Penh! It felt really good to get away from the large city and see a different city! I arrived at my hotel and immediately felt relaxed! I grabbed a bite to eat and then headed out to the Night Market-the only of it's kind in Cambodian. It was really cool! Very calm and not jammed packed like the Russian Market of Phnom Penh. Vendors let you browse without hassling you, a band played Khmer music as you enter and it is just a really nice environment. I got some fun t shirts, browsed around and then headed back to my hotel. I was spent after the day of traveling and finally being able to let down a bit. There is thing here in Asia where you can get a "pedicure" of sorts by placing your feet in a tank of fish that eat off your cuticles. It is called Dr. Fish. Well there are those Dr. Fish cuticle eating places everywhere outside of night market! I saw at least 5 places that have fish tanks with people just chilling getting their cuticles eaten care off. I cut my toe up last week on our apartment gate so I figured it wouldn't be good to stick my feet in that water, but I am really curious about it! If my toe wasn't messed up I think I would consider trying it. I headed back to my hotel, souvenirs in hand, no "pedicure" and ready for a good night's rest. I had scheduled a tour for Angkor on Friday so I was gonna need the rest.
Friday morning my tour guide met me in the hotel lobby and we headed to Angkor. You have to get your picture taken and they put it on your one day pass which you show to enter the multiple wats (temples) that make up Angkor. I should've smiled- not my best pic, haha! First we toured the infamous Angkor Wat! Angkor Wat means "temple that is a city." Wow! What site! It is considered the largest religious site in the world. Being that is was P'Chum Holiday many locals had made their way with gifts for the monks and their ancestors. Very cool sight to see! Khmer culture in full force! it is the largest religious temple in the world! it was built in 1113 and took 37 years to complete. i can't believe men built this structure! amazing! we spent from 8-12:30pm there, walking around and sitting and talking (well the guide talking, me trying to understand and hear him. khmer speak very softly which can be hard when there are 9 million kids running around screaming. I learned a lot about traditional khmer culture, the roles of men and women. thank god i was born a woman in the USA!!! so thankful! he was telling me abut how it is acceptable for khmer men to have many partners, domestic violence against women very common and arranged marriages are still the norm. historically girls do not receive education. that is slowly starting to change. he said they are about 50-70 years behind the US in terms of gender equality issues. I didn't realize that tourism here in siem reap didn't really take off until the late 1990s and they didn't have a university until 2000. crazy! another result of the war and lack of education b/c of the khmer rouge. about only 30% of the population is educated. again- another thing we in the US take for granted, the opportunity to go to school!
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Angkor Wat |
Ok so I know I always say I can't believe how much I sweat but today took it to a whole new level. literally soaked! I drank 2 liters of water! and i swear it all came out as sweat! Something odd happened as I was touring Angkor Wat. This Korean girl took my picture as I was walking past her which was weird. Apparently western people are highly admired in Asia for their white skin, big eyes, and my guide said my blonde hair. It was odd and a little flattering in a way I guess.
I had lunch by myself outside angkor wat and then we went to angkor thom. got some really cool pictures. we went to bayon and ta prohm- where the trees of the jungle have uprooted temples. I saw the infamous tomb raider tree and got a picture. Now i just need to see the movie! My tour guide was really good and took lots of pictures of me and was fun!
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| Ta Prohm |
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| bayon |
The day concluded with a much needed and appreciated shower and dinner at the hotel restaurant. I still can't believe I toured Angkor! So awesome!
Saturday I headed to Artisans D'Angkor. It is a really cool store and site where craftsmen master ancient crafts such as high quality lacquer works, silk paintings, stone and wood carvings. I spent about two hours there! I got a tour of where the crafts are created and then spent about an hour and a half in the store.
 |
| craftsman at artisans d'angkor working on a stone elephant carving |
I headed back to the hotel for a spa lunch and massage! Oh it felt soo good! Later that evening I headed out to a an Apsara performance. Apsara dancing used to be for Khmer Kings only. Very intricate dancing with beautiful costumes. It was a buffet style dinner and then performance It rained so hard that for good majority of the time you couldn't hear the music! I was a bit bummed but i hope i can catch another performance while I'm in Cambodia. Very beautiful!
Great weekend escape! I didn't want to leave!
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| angkor in reflection |
Tuesday, October 5, 2010
Lost in translation? Perhaps....My first week teaching @ Panha Chiet University!
Monday, Sept.27- Friday Oct. 1, 2010
This week started off a bit different than expected, but we quickly adapted! We had out first HIV Education/Prevention class at Panha Chiet University in Phnom Penh. It was supposed to be 30 students (males only) taught in all English, with access to a white board. We wanted to have separate classes for the male and female students to help ease the difficulty Khmer culture has when it comes to talking about HIV, specifically when it comes to the sexual transmission of HIV and proper condom use. By separating the class by gender we hoped it would ease some of that tension and encourage the students to ask questions maybe they normally wouldn't in a mixed gender setting.
Monday afternoon we arrived at the University and suddenly learned we would have to quickly adapt our plan. The class was 70 students, a mix of males and females, no whiteboard, and an expectation that we would be using a power point presentation (which we did not have). Thankfully our translator was there because everything we said had to be translated into Khmer. About 3 students of the 70 spoke some English, but besides that I could tell the translation wasn't exactly going as I would have liked. I had to use a microphone which I am sure didn't make it any easier for the students who didn't know English to understand what i was saying. As expected the translator felt uncomfortable saying words related to sex and sexual transmission of HIV. At one point we were standing in front of the class (the translator and I) going back and forth because she refused to tell the class what I was saying about HIV transmission modes because it required "sexual words" which were actually just the anatomical correct names for male and female sex organs and the three types of sex that can transmit HIV. This was incredibly awkward and uncomfortable for everyone involved. Finally I decided to switch to a different topic because I could tell the students were getting restless. We ended up not getting through the material we had planned, but that was ok. I decided to try and lighten the mood of frustration by speaking some Khmer. The students seemed to enjoy it and it broke the ice a little. Some students came up after and asked for my email and were very thankful for having us! It was time to go home and get a powerpoint prepared for the rest for the week. I hate not feeling prepared, but have gotten used to "winging it" as necessary! What a first day!
Tuesday I thought would run much smoother since I had prepared a powerpoint! Well we had another curve ball thrown at us when we arrived for the second class. We were told Monday that we just needed a flash drive with the presentation on it. They forgot to tell us we would have to bring a computer! Lesson learned- never assume! So, we scrambled for about 45 minutes trying to figure out how to insert my flash drive into the projector. No such luck! Finally a student let me borrow his laptop and we were on our way! At least now I could be sure the students could see in writing what I was saying despite if my translator chose to leave anything out. We reviewed the material from Monday's class and tried to get into Tuesday's lesson. We were able to get about halfway through the set lesson plan, but would have to play catch up again Wednesday. I was able to grab the students attention pretty well when I pulled out a condom and said we would be learning the 12 steps of how to use a condom properly! That got some smiles and giggles and lots of attentive faces! Unfortunately we didn't have a demo model to do the demonstration on so I just had to go through the 12 steps individually on the powerpoint. I explained to the students that usually we have an actual fake penis model so we can accurately demonstrate each step, but we did not have one yet. Then i saw everyone pointing at the microphone I was holding and start giggling. They wanted me to do the condom demo on the microphone! Everyone started busting up laughing! I said unfortunately that is not an accurate model so I could not use it! It was pretty funny!
The students had a lot of "what if....." questions when it came to HIV Transmission. They were good questions, but after a while it became clear we could spend an entire day on possible situations that may or may not transmit HIV. I just kept referring back to the 4 body fluids that carry HIV if someone is infected, the 5 open doors that can let the virus into the body and the 4 transmission modes that can introduce HIV into the body. We played an epidemic game which the students seem to enjoy.
The rest of the week went well in terms of teaching the class. The students became more involved and it was great! I tried to use my Khmer as much as possible which was fun too! The one frustration I had was not always knowing what was being said by the students and the translator. I became very frustrated by the end of the course of classes on Friday. There were multiple times the translator would have lengthly conversations with the students, the students would burst out in laughter, I would ask what was being said and the translator just shrugged her shoulders and said to move on with the lesson. Finally on Friday I got really upset and said (in front of the students) to the translator, "I need to know what is being said. I need you to tell me. I need you to translate for me because that is why you are here!" She could tell i was frustrated, but still only gave me a very brief overview of the conversation. I decided to ask one of the students I had come to know over the course and who knew English was what going and he told me. That was the most frustrated I have been in a very long time!
The class ended well. Friday was spent reviewing what we learned throughout the week and also answering questions they had asked on a survey that was administered Monday. The students wanted a copy of the powerpoint and my contact information so we could stay in touch. I got some pictures with the class and a group of male students who always participated and helped me out. I was exhausted by the end of the week, but so happy to have completed my first class! A very fun, challenging, and enlightening experience. Having to explain HIV in ways I had never imagined I could and really pushing my knowledge of the disease. Week three in Cambodia-check!
This week started off a bit different than expected, but we quickly adapted! We had out first HIV Education/Prevention class at Panha Chiet University in Phnom Penh. It was supposed to be 30 students (males only) taught in all English, with access to a white board. We wanted to have separate classes for the male and female students to help ease the difficulty Khmer culture has when it comes to talking about HIV, specifically when it comes to the sexual transmission of HIV and proper condom use. By separating the class by gender we hoped it would ease some of that tension and encourage the students to ask questions maybe they normally wouldn't in a mixed gender setting.
Tuesday I thought would run much smoother since I had prepared a powerpoint! Well we had another curve ball thrown at us when we arrived for the second class. We were told Monday that we just needed a flash drive with the presentation on it. They forgot to tell us we would have to bring a computer! Lesson learned- never assume! So, we scrambled for about 45 minutes trying to figure out how to insert my flash drive into the projector. No such luck! Finally a student let me borrow his laptop and we were on our way! At least now I could be sure the students could see in writing what I was saying despite if my translator chose to leave anything out. We reviewed the material from Monday's class and tried to get into Tuesday's lesson. We were able to get about halfway through the set lesson plan, but would have to play catch up again Wednesday. I was able to grab the students attention pretty well when I pulled out a condom and said we would be learning the 12 steps of how to use a condom properly! That got some smiles and giggles and lots of attentive faces! Unfortunately we didn't have a demo model to do the demonstration on so I just had to go through the 12 steps individually on the powerpoint. I explained to the students that usually we have an actual fake penis model so we can accurately demonstrate each step, but we did not have one yet. Then i saw everyone pointing at the microphone I was holding and start giggling. They wanted me to do the condom demo on the microphone! Everyone started busting up laughing! I said unfortunately that is not an accurate model so I could not use it! It was pretty funny!
The students had a lot of "what if....." questions when it came to HIV Transmission. They were good questions, but after a while it became clear we could spend an entire day on possible situations that may or may not transmit HIV. I just kept referring back to the 4 body fluids that carry HIV if someone is infected, the 5 open doors that can let the virus into the body and the 4 transmission modes that can introduce HIV into the body. We played an epidemic game which the students seem to enjoy.
The rest of the week went well in terms of teaching the class. The students became more involved and it was great! I tried to use my Khmer as much as possible which was fun too! The one frustration I had was not always knowing what was being said by the students and the translator. I became very frustrated by the end of the course of classes on Friday. There were multiple times the translator would have lengthly conversations with the students, the students would burst out in laughter, I would ask what was being said and the translator just shrugged her shoulders and said to move on with the lesson. Finally on Friday I got really upset and said (in front of the students) to the translator, "I need to know what is being said. I need you to tell me. I need you to translate for me because that is why you are here!" She could tell i was frustrated, but still only gave me a very brief overview of the conversation. I decided to ask one of the students I had come to know over the course and who knew English was what going and he told me. That was the most frustrated I have been in a very long time!
The class ended well. Friday was spent reviewing what we learned throughout the week and also answering questions they had asked on a survey that was administered Monday. The students wanted a copy of the powerpoint and my contact information so we could stay in touch. I got some pictures with the class and a group of male students who always participated and helped me out. I was exhausted by the end of the week, but so happy to have completed my first class! A very fun, challenging, and enlightening experience. Having to explain HIV in ways I had never imagined I could and really pushing my knowledge of the disease. Week three in Cambodia-check!
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Tuesday, September 28, 2010
Days 12 & 13: Skype date, wine @ VIP MiniMart, Meeting another Mutual Friend
My second weekend in Phnom Penh! This Saturday (9/25/2010) was a relaxful day. It started off with a Skype date with my mom and sister. Cambodia is 14 hours ahead of Bend, OR. So in order for me to talk to people back home it takes some planning (and praying) my internet will work. We talked for about an hour after losing the connection a minimum of 6 times.We worked around it. Thankfully Skype video chat is free! It is really cool to be able to see the people your are calling. It makes it a lot easier being so far away.
After the Skype date I did some laundry and made my way to Gloria Jean's Coffee Shop. I am fastly becoming a regular! So much for me giving up coffee while I am here! Nothing hits the spot like a small, iced, non-fat vanilla latte in 80-100* weather! Delicious!
About an hour later I walked back to the apartment. I go to the coffee shop to get away a bit, journal, enjoy the locals. I also try my freshly learned Khmer on the nice girls who work there. Only problem is when they respond I have no clue what they say! haha! Oh well! I at least want to make an effort to speak their language.
Our friend Melinda from Wat Opt orphanage came to visit this weekend. It was her first time in the city. We walked to the VIP Pho Mini Mart and shared a bottle of wine. Then the four of us went out to dinner at Flavors of India. Once again the food was soo good and we ate way too much! Thankfully we could walk a little bit of it off on the way home. Melinda has traveled to several places so it was cool to hear her share her experiences.
The AC in my room went out in the middle of night (again). Soon a cool, comfortable 75* quickly became an uncomfortable, unable to sleep 86*. Ugh!
Sunday (9/26/2010)
First thing today I told the house owner about the AC going out. It cannot be fixed until Monday so i will just have to sweat it out- literally! Thank god for cold showers and Gloria Jean's iced coffee and air conditioning!
My sister emailed me some great info on Singapore. The girls and I are thinking about taking a trip there if we have a long weekend where we can get away. Very exciting! I am going to try to do as much traveling as possible when I am here. On the list: Angkor Wat (of course), Singapore, Laos, and Vietnam. We will see how many of those I can conquer!
This afternoon I met up with my best friend Kellie's friend Hing Kim. Kellie met her over 4 years ago while she was at the riverside here in Phnom Penh. They have stayed in touch ever since. Kellie is such an awesome person. She helps support Hing Kim and her family. Hing Kim is now 19 years old and has a beautiful 4 month old baby girl Lele. Kellie wanted me to meet Hing Kim and see if there are any schools she is interested in that Kellie can help her get into when she comes here in January. Hing Kim was interested in an English school near her home by the riverside. She was also interested in becoming a hairdresser or tour guide. Her English is good and she is such a pretty girl that with the right education she could go far in the hospitality industry here. We chatted for about 2 hours. Hing Kim lives in a two bedroom home with 8 others- all family members. Since having Lele she hasn't able to work to help support the family or go to school. I am going to try to get some more information on schools that Kellie can help get Hing Kim into. My translator said she might be able to help me too. It was cool to meet another person here that knows someone back home! Great connections! Hing Kim said I can call her and she will show me more sights around the city. I will have to take her up on that!
The day concluded with a dinner with my roommates, Melinda, and some mutual friends of Melinda. Two of the older kids from Wat Opot orphanage were in the city for a yoga retreat so they came to dinner also. It was fun to see them experience something outside of the village and orphanage. There was one boy 17 years old and one girl about 15 or 16 years old I think. Later that night Melinda told me that the boy lost both of his parents to AIDS. He has five brothers and one sister. Before HIV hit his parents, his family was quite well off. They had a house, car, and attended private school. Then when his parents died of AIDS, him and his brothers and sister were orphans. Their extended family has money and the means to take care of them, but has since disowned them. Another example of the stigma associated with AIDS. None of the kids have HIV, but still their extended family refuses to have anything to do with them. Extremely sad. So these kids know what it is like to have a family, parents, good schooling. And now they know how fast all of it can disappear. The boy's oldest brother is studying to be become a nurse because he knows it is a respectable profession and he wants to help his siblings someday. Very inspiring! I am learning so much and I am so grateful!
After the Skype date I did some laundry and made my way to Gloria Jean's Coffee Shop. I am fastly becoming a regular! So much for me giving up coffee while I am here! Nothing hits the spot like a small, iced, non-fat vanilla latte in 80-100* weather! Delicious!
About an hour later I walked back to the apartment. I go to the coffee shop to get away a bit, journal, enjoy the locals. I also try my freshly learned Khmer on the nice girls who work there. Only problem is when they respond I have no clue what they say! haha! Oh well! I at least want to make an effort to speak their language.
Our friend Melinda from Wat Opt orphanage came to visit this weekend. It was her first time in the city. We walked to the VIP Pho Mini Mart and shared a bottle of wine. Then the four of us went out to dinner at Flavors of India. Once again the food was soo good and we ate way too much! Thankfully we could walk a little bit of it off on the way home. Melinda has traveled to several places so it was cool to hear her share her experiences.
The AC in my room went out in the middle of night (again). Soon a cool, comfortable 75* quickly became an uncomfortable, unable to sleep 86*. Ugh!
Sunday (9/26/2010)
First thing today I told the house owner about the AC going out. It cannot be fixed until Monday so i will just have to sweat it out- literally! Thank god for cold showers and Gloria Jean's iced coffee and air conditioning!
My sister emailed me some great info on Singapore. The girls and I are thinking about taking a trip there if we have a long weekend where we can get away. Very exciting! I am going to try to do as much traveling as possible when I am here. On the list: Angkor Wat (of course), Singapore, Laos, and Vietnam. We will see how many of those I can conquer!
This afternoon I met up with my best friend Kellie's friend Hing Kim. Kellie met her over 4 years ago while she was at the riverside here in Phnom Penh. They have stayed in touch ever since. Kellie is such an awesome person. She helps support Hing Kim and her family. Hing Kim is now 19 years old and has a beautiful 4 month old baby girl Lele. Kellie wanted me to meet Hing Kim and see if there are any schools she is interested in that Kellie can help her get into when she comes here in January. Hing Kim was interested in an English school near her home by the riverside. She was also interested in becoming a hairdresser or tour guide. Her English is good and she is such a pretty girl that with the right education she could go far in the hospitality industry here. We chatted for about 2 hours. Hing Kim lives in a two bedroom home with 8 others- all family members. Since having Lele she hasn't able to work to help support the family or go to school. I am going to try to get some more information on schools that Kellie can help get Hing Kim into. My translator said she might be able to help me too. It was cool to meet another person here that knows someone back home! Great connections! Hing Kim said I can call her and she will show me more sights around the city. I will have to take her up on that!
 |
| Hing Kim, Lele, and I. |
The day concluded with a dinner with my roommates, Melinda, and some mutual friends of Melinda. Two of the older kids from Wat Opot orphanage were in the city for a yoga retreat so they came to dinner also. It was fun to see them experience something outside of the village and orphanage. There was one boy 17 years old and one girl about 15 or 16 years old I think. Later that night Melinda told me that the boy lost both of his parents to AIDS. He has five brothers and one sister. Before HIV hit his parents, his family was quite well off. They had a house, car, and attended private school. Then when his parents died of AIDS, him and his brothers and sister were orphans. Their extended family has money and the means to take care of them, but has since disowned them. Another example of the stigma associated with AIDS. None of the kids have HIV, but still their extended family refuses to have anything to do with them. Extremely sad. So these kids know what it is like to have a family, parents, good schooling. And now they know how fast all of it can disappear. The boy's oldest brother is studying to be become a nurse because he knows it is a respectable profession and he wants to help his siblings someday. Very inspiring! I am learning so much and I am so grateful!
Monday, September 27, 2010
Day 11: Meeting with KANHNA & Meta House Documentaries
Today we met with the director of KANHNHA. It is an NGO that works with men who have sex with men (MSM), lesbians, and transgender men. He would like me to review his programs and see if there is some way I could help the organization. He was very soft spoken and his English was difficult to understand to I think I lost a bit in translation. I know the NGO does HIV outreach work and testing. He will email us information and then I will be able to get a better grasp on where I might be of assistance. Teaching his staff to be trainers and helping to review proposals are things I may work on with this NGO. We will also schedule a time for me go to visit their organization which is about 45 minutes outside of Phnom Penh. The director was saying maybe I could go out and work there a few times a month. We will see!
Later in the evening Molly and I went to the Meta House. Kate had her English tutoring class so she couldn't join us. Meta House is the German Cambodian Cultural Center. They were showing two documentaries on the sex trade of Cambodia. The first film was called "The Virginity Trade." It was about how a girl's virginity is of great value in Khmer culture. If a girl loses her virginity before marriage she it considered useless to her family and cannot be married off. She basically has no value to her family if she is not a virgin at the time of marriage. There is a belief among Asian men that having sex with a virgin girl will bring them luck, good health, great skin, and many other health benefits. Therefore, men will pay a high price to have sex with a virgin- in some cases up to $1000. Poverty is so rampant here in Cambodia that parents will sell their female children into the sex trade for money to help the family survive. A virgin is guaranteed to make the family a lot of money. Because of this, girls are bought and sold like a commodity. And the ages of the girls when they are first sold can be very young- 12 years old to even younger to ensure the girl is a virgin. Several girls featured in the film sold their virginity to help their family survive; to send younger siblings to school; to help pay for sick or dying parents. The man who buys the virgin pays the $1000 and then he takes her and has sex with her for up to one week. If the girl refuses, she is often beaten and horribly abused. Sex before marriage for a girl brings shame to her family. So once a girl is "tainted" she has no worth in Khmer culture and pretty much is stuck in the sex trade as a prostitute. After a girl is sold for her virginity, the price charged to have sex with her goes down significantly. Soon it can be she only makes $1-$2 per customer. The girl acquires a debt once she is sold and it is hard for her to ever make enough money to pay off the debt, make money for her family, and also survive. It is a vicious cycle with what seems like no way out. One girl had been raped at 16 years old and then forced to work as prostitute. In one year she had been forced to have sex with at least 700 men! 700! Unbelievable!
I learned that there are approximately over 200,000 sex workers in Cambodia- half of which have HIV/AIDS! Cambodia has one of the highest rates of HIV in Asia! The sex trade is a huge reason why the HIV rates are so high. Western men only account for about 30% of the people that utilize sex workers so mostly it is local men. In Khmer culture it is accepted (and almost expected) that a man will have many partners before marriage and continue to have other sex partners once married, including prostitutes.
There were interviews with men who have sex with prostitutes. It was sickening to hear them talk about having sex with really young girls, even gang raping girls- beating them when they refused to do something the men wanted. These men were so nonchalant about what they were doing. It is obvious they do not feel bad for what they do nor think it is wrong to treat another human being as a commodity. These girls and women are literally things to be bought, sold, and thrown away. Inhumane to say the least.
The second film was called "The Girls Of Phnom Penh." This film featured three young girls ages 16 and 17 who work as prostitutes in the city. Two of the girls sold their virginity to get money to help their mothers who were very sick and dying of cancer. They wanted to help pay for their mothers' medications and their virginity was the only thing they had of value to sell. Two girls had babies and one became pregnant again during filming. It showed their struggles to make money to help pay their "debt" to the person who sold their virginity, pay rent, send money home to the family, and then money to eat which often times they went for days without food because they had no money. A local NGO comes out every 3 months to test the girls for HIV. The girls seemed very aware of HIV and knew that they needed to use condoms with customers to protect themselves. Still they had babies so obviously condom use was not consistent. The girl who got pregnant during filming decided to abort because she couldn't afford the baby she already has. That was hard to watch. The girls had dreams of getting out of the sex trade and becoming hairdressers and finding men who would love them and marry them despite their past. At the end of the film (in the credits) it said the film crew fund raised enough money to get all 3 girls into beauty school, thus saving them from the sex trade! Upon release of this documentary in 2008 (under pressure from the US) Cambodia implemented anti-trafficking and prostitution laws. Unfortunately this back fired, making the sex trade go further underground. Also these laws made it unlikely that sex workers carry condoms because if caught with one a prostitute can face high fines and jail. This is of great concern when it comes to the spread of HIV since half of all sex workers here are infected and usually die of AIDS before age 30.
A lot to take in, but essential to know especially when it comes to HIV in Cambodia. These are great documentaries! If you have the chance I would highly recommend them.
Molly and I came home, had some wine with Kate and called it a night. I called my dad from Skype and filled him in on my adventures thus far. It's been a full first 2 weeks (well almost 2 weeks).
Later in the evening Molly and I went to the Meta House. Kate had her English tutoring class so she couldn't join us. Meta House is the German Cambodian Cultural Center. They were showing two documentaries on the sex trade of Cambodia. The first film was called "The Virginity Trade." It was about how a girl's virginity is of great value in Khmer culture. If a girl loses her virginity before marriage she it considered useless to her family and cannot be married off. She basically has no value to her family if she is not a virgin at the time of marriage. There is a belief among Asian men that having sex with a virgin girl will bring them luck, good health, great skin, and many other health benefits. Therefore, men will pay a high price to have sex with a virgin- in some cases up to $1000. Poverty is so rampant here in Cambodia that parents will sell their female children into the sex trade for money to help the family survive. A virgin is guaranteed to make the family a lot of money. Because of this, girls are bought and sold like a commodity. And the ages of the girls when they are first sold can be very young- 12 years old to even younger to ensure the girl is a virgin. Several girls featured in the film sold their virginity to help their family survive; to send younger siblings to school; to help pay for sick or dying parents. The man who buys the virgin pays the $1000 and then he takes her and has sex with her for up to one week. If the girl refuses, she is often beaten and horribly abused. Sex before marriage for a girl brings shame to her family. So once a girl is "tainted" she has no worth in Khmer culture and pretty much is stuck in the sex trade as a prostitute. After a girl is sold for her virginity, the price charged to have sex with her goes down significantly. Soon it can be she only makes $1-$2 per customer. The girl acquires a debt once she is sold and it is hard for her to ever make enough money to pay off the debt, make money for her family, and also survive. It is a vicious cycle with what seems like no way out. One girl had been raped at 16 years old and then forced to work as prostitute. In one year she had been forced to have sex with at least 700 men! 700! Unbelievable!
I learned that there are approximately over 200,000 sex workers in Cambodia- half of which have HIV/AIDS! Cambodia has one of the highest rates of HIV in Asia! The sex trade is a huge reason why the HIV rates are so high. Western men only account for about 30% of the people that utilize sex workers so mostly it is local men. In Khmer culture it is accepted (and almost expected) that a man will have many partners before marriage and continue to have other sex partners once married, including prostitutes.
There were interviews with men who have sex with prostitutes. It was sickening to hear them talk about having sex with really young girls, even gang raping girls- beating them when they refused to do something the men wanted. These men were so nonchalant about what they were doing. It is obvious they do not feel bad for what they do nor think it is wrong to treat another human being as a commodity. These girls and women are literally things to be bought, sold, and thrown away. Inhumane to say the least.
The second film was called "The Girls Of Phnom Penh." This film featured three young girls ages 16 and 17 who work as prostitutes in the city. Two of the girls sold their virginity to get money to help their mothers who were very sick and dying of cancer. They wanted to help pay for their mothers' medications and their virginity was the only thing they had of value to sell. Two girls had babies and one became pregnant again during filming. It showed their struggles to make money to help pay their "debt" to the person who sold their virginity, pay rent, send money home to the family, and then money to eat which often times they went for days without food because they had no money. A local NGO comes out every 3 months to test the girls for HIV. The girls seemed very aware of HIV and knew that they needed to use condoms with customers to protect themselves. Still they had babies so obviously condom use was not consistent. The girl who got pregnant during filming decided to abort because she couldn't afford the baby she already has. That was hard to watch. The girls had dreams of getting out of the sex trade and becoming hairdressers and finding men who would love them and marry them despite their past. At the end of the film (in the credits) it said the film crew fund raised enough money to get all 3 girls into beauty school, thus saving them from the sex trade! Upon release of this documentary in 2008 (under pressure from the US) Cambodia implemented anti-trafficking and prostitution laws. Unfortunately this back fired, making the sex trade go further underground. Also these laws made it unlikely that sex workers carry condoms because if caught with one a prostitute can face high fines and jail. This is of great concern when it comes to the spread of HIV since half of all sex workers here are infected and usually die of AIDS before age 30.
A lot to take in, but essential to know especially when it comes to HIV in Cambodia. These are great documentaries! If you have the chance I would highly recommend them.
Molly and I came home, had some wine with Kate and called it a night. I called my dad from Skype and filled him in on my adventures thus far. It's been a full first 2 weeks (well almost 2 weeks).
Friday, September 24, 2010
Day 11: Silence=Infection, Lucky SuperMarket, School for drop out youth
This morning was a bit frustrating for me, but I am trying really hard to be understanding. After our Khmer lesson, our in country coordinator was reading through the HIV teaching manual, as she will have to interpret for us with classes where English is not fluent for the participants. She said that in Khmer culture it is not appropriate for people, especially women, to talk about sex or say sexual words. The sexual words she was referring to were the proper, appropriate and medically accurate names for female and male sex organs. She said people here just don't talk about it and that we will make people very uncomfortable if we say those words. We tried to explain to her that there is no other way to educate people on HIV, transmission and prevention without talking about anatomy. Sex is the main way HIV is spread. There is just no way around talking about it if we are here to do HIV education. I explained to her we use those words not be to crude at all. The words are the appropriate ones, not slang. Kate also explained that the reason HIV spreads is because people don't talk about it- they don't talk about sex, let alone safer sex. That is why we are here. Silence equals infection. People may be uncomfortable for 2 hours a day for 5 days while in the class, but we would rather have them be uncomfortable for a few hours and know how to protect themselves against HIV versus not know and get infected! I felt myself getting really upset trying to explain why the sex discussion is so important. So I thought of my mom and Matt and how they would handle this. They would ask how could we make it more comfortable for people? What can we do to make it better, easier for people? I took a deep breath and did just that. I asked her what can we do so people will be more comfortable. She suggested separating the boys and girls- doing two separate classes. That way the girls will feel more comfortable asking questions without fear of teasing from the boys. We came to a solution! I also suggested making a "disclaimer" at the beginning of the class that this topic may be uncomfortable and we will be discussing things most Cambodians don't, but it is very important we talk about sex and how it relates to HIV. Also say that we will be using the proper terms for body parts. This is not to offend anymore or be crude. It is to provide accurate information. I do that at home in my job so it only makes sense we would do it here. She really liked that idea. We were able to come to compromise! I chalked it up to another cultural learning experience.
After that exhausting exchange we went to lunch and I visited the Lucky SuperMarket for the first time. It is isn't too far from the apartment so I can do some grocery shopping there.
Later in the afternoon we had a meeting with the director of a boarding school for drop out youth. It is a school where youth who have previously dropped out of school can come and get education, life skills training, and build character. The kids pay only for their food and the rest the program takes care of everything else. They live at the compound, which is about 45 minutes outside of Phnom Penh. To have a facility in the city is just too expensive. The school is trying to be totally self sufficient. The kids built the dorms and all the facilities there. They cook their own food, do their own cleaning, and have chores. The program wants to instill character and responsibility. Right now the education topics include accounting, English, motivation, and computer skills. It is a two year program and the kids are only allowed to go back home once every six months. After the program many go onto work in hotels or the hospitality industry. The director was very interested in us coming in to do HIV education, Healthy Relationships, and Communication. The kids also would love to practice their English with a native speaker. They are not allowed to speak Khmer at all because the program really wants them to be proficient at English. He wants us to come visit the school next week which would be really cool! I really hope this works out because I would love to teach these kids! At home i always enjoyed teaching in the alternative schools. The kids are just so much more open and ask really good questions. They have more life experience. These kids are at a greater risk for HIV, thus why we should be working with them.
We had a relaxing evening in. We were going to go to a documentary screening but Molly is fighting a bad cold so we decided not to go. Maybe tomorrow night hopefully!
After that exhausting exchange we went to lunch and I visited the Lucky SuperMarket for the first time. It is isn't too far from the apartment so I can do some grocery shopping there.
Later in the afternoon we had a meeting with the director of a boarding school for drop out youth. It is a school where youth who have previously dropped out of school can come and get education, life skills training, and build character. The kids pay only for their food and the rest the program takes care of everything else. They live at the compound, which is about 45 minutes outside of Phnom Penh. To have a facility in the city is just too expensive. The school is trying to be totally self sufficient. The kids built the dorms and all the facilities there. They cook their own food, do their own cleaning, and have chores. The program wants to instill character and responsibility. Right now the education topics include accounting, English, motivation, and computer skills. It is a two year program and the kids are only allowed to go back home once every six months. After the program many go onto work in hotels or the hospitality industry. The director was very interested in us coming in to do HIV education, Healthy Relationships, and Communication. The kids also would love to practice their English with a native speaker. They are not allowed to speak Khmer at all because the program really wants them to be proficient at English. He wants us to come visit the school next week which would be really cool! I really hope this works out because I would love to teach these kids! At home i always enjoyed teaching in the alternative schools. The kids are just so much more open and ask really good questions. They have more life experience. These kids are at a greater risk for HIV, thus why we should be working with them.
We had a relaxing evening in. We were going to go to a documentary screening but Molly is fighting a bad cold so we decided not to go. Maybe tomorrow night hopefully!
Day 10: Taylor Swift, Fa, Coconut Juice, Meeting with Trade Union Rep
Days are going by fast! Today started as usual-Khmer language and culture lesson. After, I continued to work on the HIV teaching manual we will be using once we start our classes. I also created some writing exercises related to the HIV material for the students so they can practice their English writing skills.
For lunch I headed back to the VIP Mini Mart for some Fa (Vietnamese broth and noodles). Taylor Swift music videos were on once again and on repeat! By the time I leave here I think I may know her songs better than she does! Hahaha! During lunch I was reading one of the local newspapers. There was an article about same sex marriages. Like the US, they are not legal here in Cambodia yet. It was interesting though because there was a side story on a female couple that was able to marry recently. It was ok for the females to marry each other because they both had children from previous relationships with men. The reason the government gave for not allowing male same sex marriage is that male marriage cannot create children. Interesting. I have seen several children that are in orphanages and could use parents. Lack of children is not a problem here. Oh the morals.... I did see an ad for Cambodian PRIDE which surprised me a little. Made me glad there are some progressive movements happening here in terms of equality for same sex couples!
Matt called as we were leaving the restaurant! It was really nice to hear his voice! The women here who see his picture always say how handsome he is! So fit and good lucking! I'm proud! They say if something happens to me they will go to the US and "take care of him." Haha! It was a really nice way to end my day! Now if only I could sleep....
For lunch I headed back to the VIP Mini Mart for some Fa (Vietnamese broth and noodles). Taylor Swift music videos were on once again and on repeat! By the time I leave here I think I may know her songs better than she does! Hahaha! During lunch I was reading one of the local newspapers. There was an article about same sex marriages. Like the US, they are not legal here in Cambodia yet. It was interesting though because there was a side story on a female couple that was able to marry recently. It was ok for the females to marry each other because they both had children from previous relationships with men. The reason the government gave for not allowing male same sex marriage is that male marriage cannot create children. Interesting. I have seen several children that are in orphanages and could use parents. Lack of children is not a problem here. Oh the morals.... I did see an ad for Cambodian PRIDE which surprised me a little. Made me glad there are some progressive movements happening here in terms of equality for same sex couples!
I walked back to the apartment and continued the work on the teaching manual. In the late afternoon we met with a woman who works for the Trade Union. She is a rep for the factory workers and provides them education. We met with her to discuss the possibility of doing our HIV education with the factory workers as they have little education and access to information. I learned that factory workers here make only $55/month! I was shocked! They work Monday to Friday, 8am-5pm, sometimes overtime with no pay. Just last week the factory workers went on strike demanding higher wages. They were asking for at least $95/month. My in country coordinator told me that is just not realistic (for the factory workers to get that much a salary increase) and they most likely will not get it. So pretty much they make $3/day. How does anyone live off of that, let alone support a family? Astounding! We may be able to do some short classes on the basics of HIV and maybe general health. Those classes may start in mid October. Our meeting was at the Khmer Kitchen because it is easy to get to. I ordered coconut juice and it came in an actual coconut! They just cut an opening for a straw! I got a picture of course! It was good!
That evening Molly, Kate, and I went walking around for a bit, checking out the local clothing stores. Then we headed to dinner at an Indian Restaurant. Eating at a restaurant here is so different from home. They give you as much time as you like. You have to ask to order & ask for the check. Not like at home where people are trying to turn tables to make more money. It is nice here! Much more relaxed in that aspect.
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